Day 289

Last April a Facebook friend and an “acquaintance” of mine from more than 10 years ago delivered her daughter stillborn.  I remember reading about it on Facebook and crying my eyes out for her.  Like I said, she wasn’t a close friend, but I knew her well enough that my heart broke for her.  3 months later I delivered my son stillborn.

The acquaintance that I used to pass in the halls at my old church and see working at Pottery Barn Kids every once and a while reached out to me.  She sent me a message on Facebook and let me know that she was praying for me.  She let me know if I needed anyone to talk to I could talk to her.  She sent me flowers.  She quickly changed from an acquaintance to a close friend.

She knew unlike anyone else on earth exactly what I was facing.  What happened with my son Felix that caused him to be born still only happens in 1 out of 50,000 pregnancies.  The odds of knowing someone else that it has happened to are extremely rare,  but my old acquaintance/new friend had lost her sweet daughter the same way.

It was so comforting to know that I wasn’t the only one in the entire world to go through what I was going through.  It was so comforting to read the words she wrote on the card that came with the flowers, “He heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds.”  I knew He had done that for her and her family and that he would do the same for me.

I’m forever grateful for that friendship.  I know not everyone knows someone on earth that is going through or has been through what they are going through.

This morning as I was praying for all of the people affected by the tragic tornado in Moore Oklahoma I could see with my imagination a mother sobbing over the child she lost.  God spoke to me and told me she felt like no one would ever understand how deeply her heart hurts and to pray that someone would share this scripture with her,

Isaiah 53:3 He is despised and rejected by men, A Man of sorrows and acquainted with grief…

That man of sorrows is Jesus.

He never lost a child in a devastating tornado, but when He went to the cross He was made to feel exactly what the woman grieving her child in Oklahoma is feeling today.  He was never diagnosed with cancer, but He was made to feel what a person feels when they receive that kind of news.  He never caught his spouse in an affair, but He was made to feel what someone feels when that happens to them.

Any and every kind of physical or mental pain and sorrow He’s been through.  He willingly went though it ALL, so He could relate to us in every area of our lives.  He’s not just an acquaintance with grief, He knows it, He’s lived it, He’s felt it.

Why would He put Himself through every type of grief imaginable?

He knew He must become a man of sorrows so He could become the God who heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds.  He wanted to feel what we feel so He would know exactly how to minister healing to us.

Whatever you are going through remember that there is one who knows exactly how you feel.  There is one who loves you so much He got to know your grief on a very personal level.  You are not alone, but the man of sorrows turned healer of the broken hearted is with you.

  1. Jesus went through every type of grief imaginable, for us.
  2. Jesus heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds.  Psalm 147:3.
  3. God can show you specific people that you are praying for even if you’ve never met that person.
  4. God knows what the lady in Oklahoma who lost her child is feeling and He can comfort her!
  5. My old acquaintance turned very special friend, J.J.
  6. J.J. & I went through similar situations last year, we will go through similar situations this year, but this time they will be joyful situations!  She is pregnant too and due just 3 weeks before me.  God is so cool!
  7. Felt very rested when my alarm went off this morning.  I guess that’s what happens when you go to bed at 9:45.
  8. The first responders that are working around the clock to pull people from the tornado wreckage.  True heroes.
  9. The teacher that broke the rules and prayed in school and asked God to save the kids she was laying on to protect from the tornado.  Her prayer was answered.
  10. Over 100 people have been rescued from the wreckage.
  11. So many churches and organizations running to the rescue and being Jesus for the people affected by the storms.
  12. Beau was especially patient at the mall today.  She had to spend about 30 minutes with me in a dressing room and was just as sweet as she could be!
  13. Don’t Let The Pigeon Finish This Activity Book.  Gus’ graduation present.  He loved just looking through the pages.  Should keep us busy this summer.
  14. Surprised to find this new Elephant & Piggy book came out!  Had to add it to our collection.
  15. Got to watch Gussy get his first diploma today.  He was ridiculously cute in his cap and gown.
  16. Gus did a great job saying the closing prayer!
  17. Got to see Gus’ “journal entries” for the entire school year.  It was so funny and sweet seeing what he drew each day and what he told the teacher the drawings were of.  I’m glad she took the time to write down what he said they were or I would have been lost on some days.
  18. “I Am A Promise I Am A Possibility”  what a great song for the kids to sing at graduation today.
  19. His teacher for most of the year, Mrs Cotaya, was able to come all the way from Florida to watch the class graduate.
  20. Mrs. Jeacock did a great job finishing the rest of the year out as teacher.
  21. Mrs. Harris.  Sweetest assistant teacher ever.  So glad Gus will have her again next year!
  22. Just rain this afternoon, no bad storms.
  23. Beau took a long nap this afternoon even after she slept a little before the graduation and had a cupcake at after party!
  24. Josh made delicious turkey burgers for dinner.
  25. Clean house!!!
  26. Gus & Beau played all night together.  Gus was Wreck It Ralph with his new big Ralph gloves and Beau was Fix It Felix with Gus’ hammer.  They are so cute to watch.
  27. Finished an awesome episode of Sherlock with Josh tonight.  Can’t wait for season 3 to start!

Day 47

It’s pretty natural for humans to feel sorry for themselves.  You get a flat tire, you feel sorry for yourself.  You don’t get the house you made an offer on, you feel sorry for yourself.  Your flight gets delayed, you feel sorry for yourself.  You don’t get the job you applied for, you feel sorry for yourself.  It’s usually what our first response is when things don’t go our way.

When we found out about Felix, of course I felt sorry for myself.  I couldn’t help but think, why me?  I love kids- like really, really, really love kids!  I’m a good mom!  I have made it my life’s mission to train my kids to serve Jesus with all of their hearts for all of their lives!  I wanted this baby!  Why me?

Jesus never felt sorry for Himself, but Isaiah 53:3 says He was a man of sorrows.  He wasn’t sorrowful about His life and the pain and rejection He faced, He was sorrowful for us.  Every sorrow that every man, woman, and child has faced, He took on Himself.  He loaded all of them onto His back, as if they were His own and carried them away.  He became acquainted with our grief.  Every sad emotion I’ve felt in my life, He’s felt it too.  He didn’t have to do that.  He wanted to.  He wanted to become a man of sorrows, so that I don’t have to be a woman of sorrows.

Jesus is so, for lack of a better word, SWEET!  The sweetest person to ever walk the earth.  The whole book of Isaiah 53, makes me cry, just thinking of His sweetness.  He went out of His way to take away our sorrow and get to know our grief.  He felt sorry for us, so we don’t have to feel sorry for ourselves.

  1. God’s given me 1,288 reasons over the last 46 days to remind me I have no reason to feel sorry for myself!
  2. All of the emotions I’ve felt, He’s felt for me.
  3. He took my sorrows and carried them away on His back… willingly!
  4. He’s sweet, so amazingly sweet!
  5. A few things that made Gus’ thank you list today.. Snow balls, granola bars, and of course his puppy who lives in another state.
  6. The sweet lady at the post office who saw my hands were full and carried my packages for me.
  7. Got to play dominoes with Gus.
  8. Beau’s 3 hour nap!
  9. Josh listed several things on E-bay this afternoon that I’ve been meaning to do myself.
  10. Although sometimes it gets him in trouble, I am thankful Gus is so passionate about things.
  11. The Bible tells us how to discipline.  Amazing how quickly a spanking will turn around a bad attitude.
  12. Josh always does a good job at backing me up when we have to discipline the kids.
  13. Favor with a seller on e-bay.
  14. We have been Texans for 3 years now!
  15. My sister Mindy sent me an awesome Dooney & Bourke Disney bag to borrow for our trip in November.
  16. My nephew Justin and niece in law Courtney are staying with us this weekend.
  17. They came bearing gifts for Gus & Beau.
  18. The way Beau was hugging and kissing her Bible tonight.
  19. They made it here from Tulsa safely.
  20. Great dinner at Babe’s Chicken!
  21. Beau warmed up to Justin pretty quickly.
  22. The beautiful sunset we watched on the way home.
  23. Going through Justin’s notes from his Old Testament class at ORU.
  24. For the special relationship with have with Justin & Courtney.
  25. For the special relationship they have with Jesus.
  26. For the special relationship they have with each other.
  27. That I am only going to get about 5 hours of sleep tonight, because we were having so much fun visiting.
  28. When you go after God He will totally put you on the fast track and help you make up lost time.