A few days after we found out we were going to have to deliver a stillborn baby, my husband decided we should plan a trip to Disney World. We love Disney Land and we’ve been almost almost every year since we’ve been married, but we have never been to Disney World together.
I think God gave my husband that idea. I love planning vacations, researching every little detail, finding the best deals, the best restaurants, putting together a budget, scheduling our itinerary and all of that kind of stuff. We actually started planning the trip in the hospital while we were waiting for our doctor to arrive and induce labor, and in the weeks after that I worked on the trip whenever I had any spare time.
Of course I strengthened myself in the Lord and was receiving joy, peace and healing from Him more than anything else, but planning our vacation helped too.
Proverbs 17:22 A happy heart is good medicine and a cheerful mind works healing, but a broken spirit dries up the bones.
Planning the perfect vacation for my sweet family was like taking a good medicine. It made my heart and mind happy!
When something heart breaking happens you feel like you shouldn’t be happy for a while. Like it would be wrong to smile or laugh or enjoy yourself. Like if you were to have any fun you would be moving on, forgetting about what happened, and maybe you don’t want to forget, so you are scared to be happy. I didn’t want to forget Felix and God told me I never had to. So planning the trip wasn’t to help me forget my sweet son it was just a way to bring some extra happiness into my life. You have to grieve, but you don’t have to be afraid to experience happiness throughout that process.
The Bible says being happy works like a medicine and will bring healing. If you don’t take that medicine, depression sets in and the God’s Word Translation of Proverbs 17:22 says depression drain’s your strength. You have to make a choice and decide that you are going to swallow some good medicine instead of letting your bones dry up and depression set in. I chose to take the medicine and I have not forgotten Felix and yet my heart is healed.
- The idea God gave Josh about planning the trip to Disney World.
- The way planning that trip was like a good medicine for me.
- Pillow top mattress.
- I got to use seat heaters this morning!
- When Beau woke up at 3 a.m. Josh went to see about her because he knew I had to get up early today.
- Got to meet my dear friend J.J. at Starbucks this morning. I’m still amazed God would bring me a friend like her, who has not only had to deliver a stillborn, but believes what I believe! God is good!
- J.J. treated me to tea.
- Nana & Papa have the kind of sink I can sit in while I put my make up on. Felt like a kid.
- Utica Square. I loved seeing tall trees and hearing the bells ring on a very brisk fall day.
- Lovely lunch at PF Changs with Josh, Beau and my mother in law Trudi.
- Gus got to go to lunch with his Papa, Uncle scott and cousin Ryan.
- Ryan is the sweetest 12 year old girl around. She played with Gus for hours this afternoon. She’s always so sweet to him and he adores her.
- I got to visit with my brother in law Scott for a while today.
- Josh got a great looking hair cut from his dad.
- Beau in her purple corduroy Sgt Pepper jacket. Adorable.
- Got to see my littlest niece Ava and my littlest bother Zachary today.
- Spending time with my parents this afternoon. I always love going home. Wish we could have stayed longer.
- Gus got to see his puppy!!
- Date night with Josh.
- Free babysitting courtesy of Nana & Papa.
- Good dinner at Panera Bread.
- The huge jacket Josh bought me while we were dating, I used to wear it to school and use it as a pillow when I fell asleep on my desk. It’s still here and I had to use it tonight since I forgot my coat.
- Got to go to the movies.
- Turtle Chex Mix
- We saw an extremely cheesy movie, but it was fun sitting next to Josh and him telling me exactly what was about to happen and getting it right every time.
- We were running to the car after the movie and Josh said something funny and I could not stop laughing. I actually peed my pants in the parking lot of Cinemark tonight.
- I had a SERIOUS dose of good medicine tonight.
- 37 days until Disney World!!